Biblio-blunder: Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood

Biblio-blunder is a sporadic (thankfully) feature in which we share our bookish gaffes with the world. Click on the label biblio-blunder to read more.


Last week Adele wrote about her fan letter to her favorite author. It reminded me when I wrote to an author. But it wasn't a fan letter. It was a desperate plea for help. HELP, I say!

There was a time when I could take a book, read it, and nary a mishap. Then I began to get old and feeble- minded. I got the dropsies in the bubble bathies. And the coffee spillages on the page the killer was revealed.


"As God as my witness...As God as my witness, I will never borrow a friend's precious book. Only from the library because I can always just pay the fine. No harm, no foul."

This entire speech was said with such conviction, such feeling, that all those listening shed a tear. Yes. One single tear. And a rose was involved somehow. Maybe I bit a potato. And I may have been alone. I don't remember. The point is, I could not trust myself with books.


I broke this cardinal rule one fateful day. I broke it and lived to tell the tale.

One of my friends knew I was going on a long car trip. She knew I wanted to read The Divine Secrets of the Ya-Ya Sisterhood. She knew I was clumsy and had children, but that temptress offered the book anyway! I tell you, I couldn't say no. What a fool I was! What a fool.

My old nemesis

What happened, you ask? Oh. I'll tell you what happened. Chocolate milk, the deadliest of all milks happened.

 Chocolate milk spilled out of the bottle in the cupholder into my bag o' stuff-to-do-on-a-twelve-hour-car-trip. And worse yet, I DID NOT KNOW, until it glued the middle pages together. A brown gloppy stinky mess. No chance to clean it up.

But the worst, ABSOLUTE WORST, was that this was a hard-bound, PERSONALLY AUTOGRAPHED, FIRST EDITION beautiful book ruined by yours truly. Oh. Yes. I felt so bad. It ruined my trip.


As soon as I got back to the US, I searched high and low for a replacement. I avoided my friend. I searched for a first edition that was autographed for about a week. Finally, I hunted down the address for Rebecca Wells. Then I wrote a particularly pathetic letter, explaining what happened and begging her for an autographed copy. Every possible mean of contacting were included. I didn't hear from her.

I finally gave up. After nearly two months I tracked down an autographed, first edition. I bought it and placed it in the bag with the ruined book. I wrote another pathetic letter apologizing and explaining what happened. I gave it to her husband and, like a coward, left the scene.


My friend called me later that week and told me it was fine. That she hated that I was so stressed about it, I should've told her, no need for another one, etc. She's even offered to let me borrow more books. I always say NO!

But that, folks, is not the end. About two months after this, I get a phone call. Guess who it was? Ms. Wells' assistant! Yes! She called me! They got my letter and wanted to help me. She was so very very nice. I thanked her profusely and told her I had purchased one already. She kind of laughed, apologized for taking so long to get back to me, that they understood what happened and if there was anything else that they could help with to let them know.


So, that, my folks, is my "writing an author" story. Pathetic? Yes. Will I ever borrow someone's book? Unless I can run to Barnes and Noble to replace it, then NO! I learned my lesson. Again.

Please feel free to share your bookish horror stories so I don't feel quite so bad.

Biblio-Blunder: Quiet in the Library!

Biblio-blunder is a recurrent feature in which the Mrs. BG gals (mainly me, unfortunately) share our bookish gaffes with the world. Click on the label biblio-blunder to read more. 

Have you missed my silliness? Possibly not with all the entertaining and informative posts published by the fabulously talented DeLynne, Izzy, Tracy and Leslie--- but I have certainly missed reporting all the silly bookish happenings from rural Oklahoma. 

Even with all the aggravations that have thwarted my blogging recently (hurricane flood, major work deadline, computer virus and worse), little absurdities continue to make me laugh (mainly at myself) and to perk up my day. Actually, this particular event was not so much a perk up as it was a jumpstart of adrenaline.


Now, it has been awhile since I have had a goofy doofus moment to share (or biblio-blunder as it is now known)--  but this one is a doozy:  

As I  sat in the school library totally immersed in speech therapy paperwork, an odd sound caught my attention. A hissing coffee maker sound. After ignoring it for a few seconds, I glanced around for the source. Nothing hissing on my table so I turned to get up and looming right behind me was a six foot tall figure that looked something like this:

AAIIEEEEEE!   Yep,  a bloodcurdling scream right smackdab in the middle of the library!  An oscar winning scream!  Okay... Okay.. that is an exaggeration but it was definitely a scream worthy of one of the  horror movies  that Enbrethiliel features at Shredded Cheddar. For all I know, librarian's ears pricked up world wide... Okay, that is another exaggeration but the mental image tickles me. 

What I do know is that the scream scared the bejeebers out of my lurker---  which gave me immense satisfaction. Mwahahahha!

Poor lurker---  He exclaimed: Didn't you hear me breathing!!
As if the scream was my fault!  Wonder if my claim that he sounded like a coffee maker crushed his ego? Probably not if the heehaws, as he raced down the hall, were any indication.

Vengeance will be mine though. You see, I have discovered his identity...

Have you ever committed a 'too loud' biblio-blunder in a library?  

DeLynne's Biblio-Blunder

I joined some of my dear work colleagues for dinner at a Thai restaurant near the beach. After coffee we were drawn outside by people sending off, coincidentally, Thai paper lanterns (not as many as in the photo, though!).

Walking near the water I heard one woman, a happily married mother and teacher say to another work mate, 'I have to give you that dirty pick-up book.'

I was shocked that she would own a dirty pick-up book and even discuss it in front of us. Also, I was a little curious about what it really was. They dissolved into guffaws when I asked. She had actually said, 'That Jodi Picoult book.'

Here's hoping it's only my hearing that is faulty, and I don't have a terminal case of gutter mind!

biblio-blooper: The Sea of Monsters

News and movie bloopers are a hoot and print bloopers can be hysterical... especially the ones in Headlines on the Tonight Show with Jay Leno.

But what about typos, punctuation mistakes and all around bad editing in the text of the book you are immersed in reading?

Hmm, not as amusing, is it. In fact, biblio-bloopers can be quite jarring... ripping the reader out of the story at the speed of light. Such an unpleasant jolt. At least for me... what about you?

A bit irritating since I have to read the sentence over and over-- sometimes flipping back to the page just to read it again. And I am not OCD, really! Biblio-bloopers just prey on my mind. Even a chapter away, I know it is there... lurking.

Seriously though, how some biblio-bloopers make it past the copy editors boggles the mind. And whenever I spot one I always wonder two things: Have other readers noticed it? Does it appear in other editions?

To banish these bogeys from my mind, I've decided to start a recurring very randomly scheduled feature titled Biblio-blooper. I'll post the biblio-blooper with page and edition number. Hopefully, a bloggy friend or two will check their copies.

Today's biblio-blooper is brought to you by Rick Riordan's The Sea of Monsters, first edition, page 270, third paragraph:

Grover told me he could dissolve the empathy link between us, now that we were face to face, but I told him I'd just assume keep it if that was okay with him.

Hey, that was quite cathartic! If you discover a biblio-blooper and need to banish it from your mind, feel free to post them with the biblio-blooper title and credit back to Mrs. BG. :o)

Edit: Carin from Caroline Bookbinder suggested I remind participants that it is not kosher to post biblio-bloopers from an ARC since that is not the final copy of the book. I don't read ARCs so that never occurred to me. By the way, Carin has an amazing series called Careers in Publishing that you should check out if you haven't already.

Find Your Nearest Half-Price Books!

Rachel Lehrberger, the manager of Half-Price Books in Oklahoma City, kindly informed me that her bookstore is still in biz. Woohoo! And very tactfully informed me that I had been shopping at the 75% off bookstore in OKC all this time-- that is the store that closed. Doh! Another bookish goofy doofus moment to add to my coffer of goofy doofus moments.

What a ditz! Now I am so mixed up-- Was the Branson outlet bookstore a Half-Price or a 75off store? Which one did I go to in Plano, Tx? An online search shows both are in Plano. My bookish in-laws always squire us around so maybe I've been in both stores. You know what is really bad? I've been in all these stores multiple times.

Despite my mix-up, Half-Price Books is a great bookstore for deals. They are located in sixteen states. Please check the store locator--- maybe there will be a Half-Price Books in your neighborhood.

If you are wondering about the 75% Off bookstore, it seems they are only in Texas? But please don't hold me to that! ;o) I couldn't find a company website-- just one website for the Plano store and few addresses on google for other locations.

Are You A Bookish Goofy Doofus?

What a goofy doofus. I walked all the way from the car to the door of Walmart carrying my newly checked out library books! Thank goodness I realized in the nick of time--- the greeter would have tried to stick stickers all over them!

That was a first. My usual bookish doof is attempting to pay at a store with my library card rather than with my credit card.

Please say I'm not the only one. What bookish doofs have you committed?

By the way, my new library books are The Lightning Thief and Stolen. I hadn't heard of Stolen by Vivian Vande Velda but the synopsis sounds promising: a childstealing witch is hunted down then a mysterious girl with no memory appears in the woods. Have you read this one or any other books by this author?